BOULDERS 1

p. 139-151 (I am including two classes 2/15 and 2/22)

Removing boulders is like rolling away the stone that covers the crypt you are in.

You are not dead, just in the dark, and feeling trapped as if this is the way it is always going to be. Oh, yes, you read books, go to workshops, journal, mediate, do yoga, drink green tea, and you can see bit of light creeping in from from where the boulder is not quite flush with the ground, and somedays the light seems brighter than others, and somedays it’s pretty dim and somedays you wonder if it is there or was there at all.

It’s time to roll back the stone and sit in the light, because the Light is who you are.

(I realize we all have more than one boulder, more than one negative pattern that we have inherited or created, but I still think rolling back the stone and coming into the light is an apt metaphor.)

In the next few pages the guides seem to bounce back and forth describing the process as not being easy, it is a “substantial undertaking” and that it is not “abracadabra” yet at the same time telling us “We are going to blast it, as it were, and transmute it;” and “Now earlier in this chapter we said it’s not going to be abracadabra. A magic wand is not going to come down and tap on your boulder three times and get it out of the room. But what we are going to tell you is this. It does not need to be dismantled through an extended process that requires that you hold, hug, embrace, touch, examine, and self-identify as your boulder. ”

Do not be overly confused with the seeming contradictions here. There are simple yet powerful principles to be aware of: 1) old patterns of thought are being released; 2) what we call ‘time’ is a measurement of change in the material world, it has nothing to do with Spirit; 3) releasing an old pattern is about raising your frequency so that it no longer “sticks”—-willingness, intention, openness, awareness, being willing to experience that which you choose to let go of(and that might sometimes be difficult and painful). 

What we might begin to perceive as a negative pattern of thought, action or belief that no longer serves us has probably been around for quite some time—it has taken root, it has been reinforced by others and sometimes by our culture until it eventually becomes part of who we think we are. So to the ego, this kind of transformation/transmutation is like losing a part of yourself—and so old Mr. or Ms. Ego is going to hang on and fight for dear life. All of this is part of the dismantling of the boulder that we need to be aware of. (There might be anger, grieving, and a sense of loss as well as becoming comfortable with a “new identity” that we might need to contend with.)

Here is one the keys on p. 145: 

“Now we are not doing it. You are going to do it. And you are going to choose one thing today that you want to clear and clear once and for all in the Christ frequency that we claim as Word. You are going to do this with an intention to decide, once and for all, that it is your divine right to be without this thing that has created your pain, or that you give power to in such a way that it creates your pain.”

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“Now when you say, “I am Word through this thing that I identify as my pain,” you are bringing the Christ frequency to the energy that has been created in pain, and that begins to work on the pain.”

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Let me choose something I think most of us can identify with. It is a huge boulder of mine and I feel if I can release/dismantle this one, everything else will follow in a much smoother way.

OK here it is: “NOTENOUGHNESS.” There are many ways of describing this—unworthy, unloveable,… No matter how we might define this one it always ends up with me giving my power away somehow, becoming a victim to a set of thoughts ideas, fears, and circumstances.

So here is the boulder I wish to clear. I created it. I was not born with it, but through a number of life circumstances (embarrassing situations, “mistakes,” religious teachings, etc.) I started to take in the message—“I am not enough” and if, like me, you were surrounded by many others who either consciously or unconsciously carried the same message (of notenoughness), then you could never get the affirmation or support you needed to deny the implications. So we say to ourselves, “It’s probably true; I’m not enough.” And that thought becomes part of the definition of who we think we are, and we find ways to affirm that and make it into the truth as life goes on. We can even "protect"ourselves by creating an inner voice that reminds us of our notenoughness, so if someone else says something demeaning, we have already "beaten them to the punch." I think you can see how deeply we can be rooted in this kind of thinking, so much so that we think it is who we are.

On the outside we might appear to be serene and in charge, but my insides are holding on as tight as they can, attempting to ride out the storm of life.

Obviously this pattern and many like it are painful to carry around and to feel. 

Here is the first step provided for us:

“when you work on this, you have to work on it in several levels.

The first level is the creation of the pain:

“I choose this one thing now that I am going to undertake to clear from my consciousness once and for all and I am going to affirm this: In my intention to release this pattern of [fill in the blank], I am now willing to undertake the exercise that follows. In this work I will become actively engaged in the focus and responsibility of my own healing through my understanding that it is my will in alignment with the will of my Creator that supports me in choosing to release that which creates my pain.

“I do this now with the understanding that I will have to see the pain that I am releasing and I must address it clearly and with light. I do this now with the intention to remove myself from the role of victim that may perpetuate this pattern and give me solace on any level. I affirm that I am releasing any blame attached to the creation of this pattern that supports me in holding it to me to affirm my worthlessness, or my rage, or my entitlement to my anger.

“I choose today, once and for all, to decide I can change my life for good. I affirm this now in the highest frequency available to me at my present state of awareness of my Christed Self. I am Word through this intention. Word I am Word.”

More to come as we dismantle all those patterns that no longer serve.


“the next step of the clearing is to actually create a frequency of a high enough level that you can begin to clear the pattern in its cell memory of the body that you are in, which is also the attachment and the embellishment of it on many, many levels.”

We've explored this idea before in a general way, and here is tis very practical application.

If in your past state of mind you were velcro, then everything stuck to you and you probably did not know why. You were just always in victim consciousness.
Now, however through Awareness, willingness, and intention you are raising your vibrational level to be more like teflon. Less and less stuff sticks--because there is nothing for it to stick to.

We are no longer justifying any pattern of thought or behavior that would in anyway support the idea of separateness, and as we do that we become more and more clear, more and more truth, more and more love.

“The process of clearing a boulder is as follows:
“I am Word through this thing I see before me. Word I am Word. I am Word through this creation of pain that I have manifested for whatever reasons that is now obstructing my spiritual growth. I am now choosing to relinquish any and all attachments to this patterning of pain and all that it has created in my life. I am now willing to achieve a Christ consciousness that does not align to this pain but clears it from my cellular memory, from my auric field, from my awareness, from my physical reality in perfect ways.
“I am a Creator working in tandem with the Great Creator, I am a Light working with the Great Light, and I am a Christ working with the Great Christ in frequency. I am in alignment now with the vibration of the Word and I choose to release this boulder of pain in a perfect way that will result in my Creative Self working through this issue quickly, easily, and with consciousness. I am Word through this intention. Word I am Word.”

I would encourage all of us to repeat the affirmations/prayers in this chapter. This is not usually a one shot deal.

Peace.